I'd like to buy a vowel.

Albeit

Tue, 27 May 2008 01:24:18 GMT

I am officially defunked. Although it took some doing. It's amazing what 5 days in Cancun with your best friend of 30 (gulp) years can do. Especially if she has been trying to ~~corrupt me~~ get me to loosen up for at least 25 of those years. Now, what happens in Cancun stays in Cancun, but I can share the following:

She did get me out of my tankini and into a bikini (albeit with a cover up). Apparently everyone wears a bikini in Cancun no matter what their shape or size.

We got tattoos (albeit temporary/henna ones, much to my hubby's relief).

She worked on my flirting skills (albeit with our husbands and via text messages).

All in all, the trip was a huge success and a follow up trip is in the works. Vegas, here we come (maybe!).

But wait, there's more. I was home for 3 days and then off to the Jersey Shore. It was a beautiful Memorial Day weekend here. And NJ is notorious for having horrid weather on Memorial Day weekend. We had to take advantage of your good fortune. So 2 more days of sun and sand for me albeit the ocean was a tiny bit colder. We came back Sunday so we could fit in a visit with the in-laws and avoid Monday traffic.

Now it's back to the routine!

Go, Redwings!!

Welcome to ..... Funkytown

Mon, 12 May 2008 01:50:35 GMT

An in, I'm in a "funk."

Sorry for recent radio silence.

Other than running an infirmary, things are fine here. No obvious reason for said funkiness. Hopefully upcoming trip to Cancun will alleviate the funktitude.

Happy Mothers Day to all the mommies out there.

Hugs,
Krystn

Adventures in Tanning, Politics, and Party Planning

Thu, 17 Apr 2008 02:32:14 GMT

First and foremost, happy birthday to my DH. As usual, The Girl was in charge of planning his special day.

She made a list in her "Kindergarten" spelling. It went something like this:

1. Cake
2. Streamers
3. Party hats
4. Bubbles
5. Games (limbo, freeze dance, and duck, duck, "Helen")
6. Thank everyone for coming

Usually, she helps me (& Betty Crocker) make the cake. It must be pink, because that is Daddy's favorite color. (Sometimes I don't know how she can get around with him wrapped around her little finger like that.) This morning we talked about the list and how busy we were. She suggested that I make the cake without her and then she could frost it after school. (Time management and delegation skills at 5!) Here's a picture of the cake. Move over Martha Stewart.

Second, the budget passed.

We're all very excited about that! That was our goal. We had decided that getting all the parents to vote was the way to do this and that's where we focused most of our efforts. So while I'm thrilled that the budget passed, I'm a bit discouraged by the fact that fewer people voted this year than last. Next up is the Middle School referendum. But right now we are all taking a break. And I get to blog again.

And third, well the third requires back story. My best friend (P) still lives in Michigan which means I actually only see her every other year or so. We've been talking about going on vacation together for awhile now. What better reason than turning 40. We decided to time our big escape between our birthdays. We tried to bring the guys along, but my DH was unwilling. If you need to ask why, don't. It's not a pretty explanation.

Our requirements for the trip were somewhere warm, sunny, beachy, and with a spa. We decided on Cancun. Neither of us have been there. And we've finally finalized our trip. May 16-20! Happy Mothers Day to us!!

Now P knows people who have been there recently and they warned her about the strength of the sun. I asked her if she was going to "tan" before she went. Answer "yes." Uh, Mom, stop reading here, OK?  I am pretty pale and not what you'd call an avid sun worshiper.   And I have never gone to a tanning salon. But, I have decided it's probably a good idea. I really don't want to get a burn while I'm there and be miserable. (Remember the spa....who wants a massage when you've got a sunburn?) And, I am sure my chubby legs would look better with a tan. Fianlly, I don't think I've ever been able to get my shins to tan. They backs of my calves, sure. But not the front. What is up with that? Oh, and we are not even going to discuss my thighs.

So off I go to the local salon. I declare myself clueless to the cute young thing (CYT) working there. I tell her I'm heading off to Mexico, want a base, blah, blah, blah. She says, "We'll you're pretty pale. We'll put you in our 42." I gather that is their lowest "voltage" bed. Sounds good to me since I'm pretty nervous about this whole thing anyway. I've never thought tanning "beds" were a good idea, but I am determined that nothing is going to ruin this trip. And how bad could it be if I just do it this one time (OK, ten before I go) in my life?

Now I've got my UV goggles, towel and moisturizing lotion. We head back to the bed. Does everyone know that they are not beds anymore? You just stand there? Lesson # 1. I am looking into a tiny closet, and the CYT points out the timer, music volume and off/on switch. The timer is set for 11 minutes. She says to let me know if I want to come out sooner, so she can reset it. I have no idea what that means. Before I an ask, she opens another hidden door to the actual bed (another teeny tiny closet) with the lights etc. and points out the exit sign. Oh god! People get lost/stuck in here? No, she explains, they just get turned around sometimes and it all looks the same inside.   And she leaves. Then I'm alone in my little closet.

Or am I? There aren't any hidden cameras in here are there? Nervousness is moving into paranoia. And now I think of all the questions I forgot to ask. Like, do I take everything off?   Hmmmm. I have a one piece swim suit so I don't really have to, but I don't want any funny lines from my bra. I finally decide to forgo the bra but keep the underwear. I check again for the hidden camera and strip. OK, now for the goggles. Which have to be assembled? While I'm standing here practically naked, looking for the hidden camera, and now double-checking that the outside door is locked. I finally get the damn things on, flip the switch and go in the "bed." Fortunately I'm not claustrophobic. After the 11 minutes are up, the lights go out, I go back out dry off and look in the little mirror. No obvious change, but that's good. I need to ease into this thing. I quickly change and turn to leave. On the outer door are all the warnings, etc. And oh, look! A chart recommending the timing for beginning tanning sessions. First time, 4 minutes; second time, 5; third, 6. I stopped at this point. FOUR minutes. I've been fried. Deep fried! Crispy critterized! I check the mirror again. I don't look red. Maybe I don't burn as easily as I thought. Deciding not to panic, I head home to hit the shower. I get out of the shower and my shoulders seem a bit red, but I attribute that to the hot water in the shower. Trying off, my stomach is a little pink and so are the tops of my thighs.   Not great, but at least I'm not a lobster. Fast forward 2 hours. Neck, torso (including the "girls"), and back are all bright red. Strangely my face is barely pink. My arms seem a bit tanner but not red, pink or burned. The tops of my thighs are a little pink too. My shins....snow white! No effect at all. I am a freak of nature. Put me in blue shoes and I'd look like a "rocket pop."

That was yesterday. I still look like a lobster today. A bra is impossible. Every time the munchkins touch me it hurts. And tonight's adult birthday festivities have been postponed. (MOM, I told you to stop reading already!)

I'm scheduled to go back on Sunday.

I'm back.....

Sat, 05 Apr 2008 01:52:55 GMT

But just for a quick post. If I start visiting Friend Pages I'll never get to sleep tonight. And sleep is a priority tonight. So a few quick thoughts:

1. April is Autism Awareness Months; I hereby pronounce you "Aware." If you know a parent of a child with autism, give them a hug. I guarantee you they need it.

2. School funding and property tax reform. We can put a man on the moon, and we can't fix this. Check this out.   www.voteyesfordenville.com This is what I have been working on for the past 6-7 weeks. If anyone has feedback, we'd love to hear it; especially from someone objective.

3. Related to #2. Wow, am I glad I found LJ before I ever visited other online forums or blogs! I need to get back here to reaffirm my faith in people. And don't be fooled by #2. I still hate politics.

Now for the good stuff. The Boy has moved on from being obsessed with presidents to being obsessed with presidential assassinations. Today we printed out pictures from Wikipedia of the assassinations of Lincoln and Garfield. OK, maybe that's not good.

We went to a theatre and saw Horton Hears a Who. It took 10 minutes (& several bribes) to get The Boy into the theatre (mega-plex type). We watched through the open doors of the room while sitting in the hall but we did it. Thanks go to The Girl. I was going to take her by herself for 1 on 1 time with mommy, but she wanted to go as a family.

Yes, this means Dr. Seuss is still a big hit at our house.

And so are bugs. We went hiking last Sunday and managed to find some insects and other "fauna." We saw Yellow Citronella Ants (we had to research on line to figure out what they were), a millipede and a slug. And we brought home (for a few hours only) a snail. I get major mommy points for all that.

Today in Science at school, the Munchkins learned about dung beetles. Guess what they eat?

The Boy is spending time with a typical class and doing pretty well. It's been an experience. Perhaps someday I'll share. Too tired tonight and it is a long story.

The Girl still loves Daisis and gymnastics. We'll also be trying soccer again this Spring.

Good night. Sleep tight.
Krystn

Doing a happy dance!

Mon, 03 Mar 2008 01:56:07 GMT

February is OVER!  My goal for February was not to buy any new books (ahem, for me). And I did it!  Thank God I picked the shortest month of the year. So, of course, today I went to the bookstore.  I am now the proud owner of the following:

Dead to Me by Anton Strout
Happy Hour of the Damned by Mark Henry
The Outer Demon Wails by Kim Harrison
Predatory Game by Christine Feehan (guilty pleasure)
Biting the Bullet by Jennifer Rardin
The Cat in the Hat by Dr. Seuss
The Cat in the Hat Comes Back by Dr. Seuss

They didn't have the Goblin Quest books in stock (BAD bookstore. BAD!) I'll have to order those online.  Then I'll be tempted to pre-order books, and I always end up wishing I hadn't. I miss the immediate gratification of buying a book The Day it is released in a store. No, I'm not impatient; not me. And it's not as if I don't have anything to read, either.

But March also means a new goal. You know what it is, don't you? I've given you enough hints. It's back to the gym for me. At least 4 days a week. I am so cringing as I write this. And I'm already making excuses for not going tomorrow.

The boy is sick and has a fever. A fever today means no school tomorrow.  Yes, we have been getting the antibiotics in him so I don't think we are dealing with the strep here. Probably a virus.  And this time he is acting sick; he's currently passed out on the couch.

Tomorrow is Read Across America Day. The Munchkins have been learning about Dr. Seuss at school in preparation for the festivities; hence The Cat in the Hat books above. We already have several Dr. Seuss books but they are some of the lesser known titles. The Girl even drew a picture to mail to Dr. Seuss for the Cat in the Hat book. She wants to mail him the picture, but I don't think he could use it, even if he were still alive. Ahem, take a look.

It's his TAIL, people. Get your minds out of the gutter.

Seriously, that is one happy looking cat. DH and I can't keep a straight face when we look at it. She wants to know why we keep laughing. Anyone want to volunteer to explain it to her?

Have a great week.

A is for.....

Fri, 29 Feb 2008 00:18:32 GMT

antibiotics.

*Note: names have been changed to protect the innocent.

Sunday night as I was drifting off to sleep, my DH says, "My throat has been scratchy for several days now. I think I have strep"

Me: Can't be strep. Strep really hurts; you'd hardly be able to swallow.
DH: Uh, no. Remember last year when I had strep and my only symptom was the scratchy throat. I had to take antibiotics.

[Remember last year? I can barely remember yesterday.]

Me: No, but if you say so, Streptococcus Stan (SS). Maybe you should go to the doctor.

DH grunts, falls asleep and begins to snore. OK, maybe I wasn't overly sympathetic, but DH is a self-proclaimed hypochondriac.

Monday night. The Boy develops a cough. No fever, no other symptoms at all.

Since he seemed fine Tuesday morning, I sent him off to school. At the end of the day his teacher said that she did send him to the nurse during the day because he was coughing and a bit flushed. No fever and his lungs were clear, but he did have a red throat. None of this even warranted a call home, and believe me the nurse would have called if she suspected he was sick in any way. I still decided to take him to the pediatrician just to be sure it wasn't something serious. No, nothing serious.....just STREP. Thank you, SS. Arrgghh. Note: The Boy felt (and still feels) fine. He was just mad as hell because he had to have a throat culture. I called SS and told him about The Boy, sent him to the doctor, and got the prescription filled. FYI, SS also has Strep. Which brings me back to antibiotics. Which I hate.

[I hate antibiotics. I hate the way they make me feel.   The resulting GI distress is worse than whatever it is they're supposed to cure. And most of them are the size of horse pills and need to be taken 4 times a day for 10 days. I'd rather just let my white blood cells duke it out alone. Finally thery developed a once-a-day-for-5-days drug that I could tolerater. Until, I had my babies. The short story is that it was a c-section with complications and infection. I was on antibiotics for about 6 weeks. Prophylactic antibiotics. Then antibiotics to "cure" the infection caused by the prophylactic antibiotics. And finally stronger antibiotics because the 2nd round didn't work.]

Tuesday night.   I actually got the boy to take a spoonful of the antibiotics without too much fuss. He just washed it down with some chocolate milk, and there was brief moment of maternal bliss.

Wednesday morning. Picture a WWF match:

Announcer: In this corner, Jumpin' Jack Flash (JJJ). 44 inches tall and 40 pounds, wearing Spiderman pajamas and armed with epic stubbornness. In the opposite corner, Mean Mommy. Just under 5"7," weight undisclosed, & armed with antibiotics and a spoon.

[You didn't really think I'd tell you my weight? BTW, the gym call again yesterday.]

Announcer: You know the rules. Mean Mommy, no hitting, pinching, kicking, biting. Inflicting any type of pain on your opponent results in immediate disqualification. Jumpin' Jack Flash, as usual, anything goes.

Ding!

We wrestled around for awhile and then the referee (DH) intervened. With his help I finally got the antibiotic into The Boy (and all over me, DH, the boy, and the kitchen). Wash, rinse and repeat twice a day for 8 more days.

[Yes, I know you all have suggestions on how to get him to take his medicine. Trust me, we've tried them all.]

Did I mention I hate antibiotics?

Currently reading: Greywalker by Kat Richardson and The Sister by Poppy Adams
Just finished: Black Magic Woman by Justin Gustanis
Up next: Happy Hour of the Damned by Mark Henry and Dead to Me by Anton Strout

Yes, we have no bananas.

Sat, 23 Feb 2008 02:05:16 GMT

We have no bananas today. We did, but now we have banana cookies and banana bread instead.

We also have lots of snow and ice. I've always liked to bake on cold winter days.  So add the weather to a bunch of overripe yellowish-brown fruit and you get banana bread and cookies.

Obviously school was closed and even Hubby stayed home from work. But I am still fried. The Munckins were only in school one day this week. They were restless and bored, and I was intolerant. Not a good combo. Bad Mommy.

Oh, and it wasn't good snow for making snowmen.

Have a great weekend, all.

Out of the mouths of babes

Fri, 22 Feb 2008 03:09:27 GMT

I think my son just called me a bimbo. He was mumbling and I can't get him to tell me what he said, but still.....

Mish Mash:

As some of you are probably aware, jimhines is running a poll to pick the recipient of a free copy of his Goblin Trilogy. There is a movement afoot to provide a copy of his books to each of the potential recipients (12 in all). They are all more than worthy. If you are interested, you can learn more and/or donate here here.

Forget about killer bees invading from the South/Central America, I'm more worried about Burmese pythons.

Presidents are so yesterday. Thanks to McDonald's Happy Meals, The Boy's current obsession is Spiderwick. After all, it does have goblins. He loves goblins, almost as much as zombies and skeletons. Toy Story is still a close second. Again, he could care less about Buzz or Woody. No, his favorite is Babyhead?!?!

Tomorrow is shaping up to be another snow day for the munchkins. They've already been home 3 days tihs week for Presidents' Day and teacher in-service. That gift certificate for a massage may come in handy this weekend.

I've finally started watching a little TV again. I mean other than Noggin. The Sarah Connor Chronicles, Lost, and Jericho; that's it. But I am loving all three.

I just received a copy of Black Magic Woman by Justin Gustanis (signed-*squee*). I'm going to start reading that tonight. Next up, an ARC of the The Sister by Poppy Adams for my book club.

Spring cleaning. I am currently trying to find the basement. Is there a 12 step group for pack rats? If I can dig out the pool table, there are one or two people from my husband's office who might be interested in adopting it. Then I could transform it into a playroom and reclaim the main floor for grown-ups. Hey, I can dream, can't I?

OK, time to watch Lost.

A Valentine's Potpourri

Thu, 14 Feb 2008 16:09:13 GMT

Happy Valentine's Day!

I am pleased to report that the ice has melted and the Munchkins are back in school. But even though they were home with me yesterday, they (& I) managed to learn a great deal.

First, you can make a damn fine pirate ship out of a laundry basket, hamster wheel, poster board, yard stick, ladle (anchor), and 2 spatulas (oars in case you are stuck in the doldrums). I wish I had a picture, but I needed to disassemble the thing to do laundry and make dinner.

Second, both the Munchkins can fit comfortably in an adult size sleeping bag. This is now the preferred position for watching TV.   However, said sleeping will not hold Mommy and both Munchkins. Did I mention the gym was looking for me?

Third, President Polk died of chronic diarrhea. I'm sorry, but I had to share that. What an awful way to go. I know this because The Boy's new obsession is presidents. The Boy's favorite president is Lincoln. Sadly, I had to tell The Boy he is dead. He seems to have accepted this, but now he wants to go see one of the living presidents. (I told him I'll work on it.) In addition, we learned how to identify several lesser known presidents simply by what they looked like. (Cursed sticker book again!) It is fun trying to explain why the older presidents wore their hair that way. ;) I know Dad will be thrilled with this interest in politics. See, Dad? I told you it skipped a generation.

Fourth, stemming directly from the third, my children discovered money. Until the Valentine's Day cards started arriving, I was able to keep them limited to coins. But once paper money started showing up in the cards, it became all about the bills. Today after school we will go spend that money and learn about the buying power (or lack there of) of the dollar. Me and The Munchkins in a toy store....wish me luck. I also tried to explain about banks. That got me a couple of blank (or maybe it was incredulous) looks.

Fifth, the Munchkins are angels. OK, I already knew this; but I was due for a reminder. They can pull off a mean imitation of demon spawn if they want to.

DH is a wonderful husband. Not perfect, but neither am I; and I think my quirks are harder to put up with than his. Of course, he got my many ~~subtle~~ hints and gave me a gift certificate for a massage. Yippy! I am still working on his gift. Gifting DH is difficult at best. In the nearly 12 years we've been together, I think I've only gotten him one gift he truly loved. If he needs or wants something he usually just goes out and buys it himself. But this year I have a super idea. I think. We'll see. Can't tell you what it is in case he's reading this. If you are, don't worry, honey. I am not kidnapping you and taking you to Canada again.

Presidentially yours.

The First 100 Days

Mon, 11 Feb 2008 01:58:50 GMT

If you're expecting a political essay on FDR and the New Deal, you can stop reading here.

Tomorrow is the 100th day of school here in my fair town. Typical kindergartners (& their families) mark the occasion by creating a display of 100 items to bring to school. I already mentioned (briefly) my daughter's project: 100 buttons shaped like a flower.

My son is in a Special Education Kindergarten class which is not doing these sort of projects. But The Boy seemed very interested in The Girl's project, and I decided to do one with him too. Now, since The Boy loves Star Wars, I thought 100 Star Wars stickers on a piece of poster board would be a super idea. I asked him, and he agreed.

I should probably tell you that stickers are very popular with The Boy. He doesn't like to stick them to anything. No, he uses them more like finger puppets, and they end up everywhere. It's virtually impossible to walk out of my house without a stow-a-away sticker attached to you somewhere. With this in mind, I bought the grand poo-bah of Star Wars stickers books for this project (600 stickers in one book) hoping that he would have enough to play with and do the project.

We tried to start this project last week, and guess what?! "Mommy, I changed my mind. I don't want to do Star Wars stickers. I want to do sloths."

Sloths? SLOTHS! Where in the %^&* was I supposed to find 100 sloth stickers? So I started heavy-duty lobbying for Star Wars. Nope, he insisted on sloths. Well, I did what any Mommy worth her salt would do. I put off the project for a day or two hoping that he would forget all about sloths. (BTW, I blame Diego for this fiasco.)

Suddenly, it was Friday, and my self-imposed deadline was looming. After school I nonchalantly pulled out the poster board and sticker book. Of course I was shot down again. In desperation I scrounged up all the stickers I had to see if anything could substitute for sloths. Uh, no! But suddenly The Boy had a renewed interest in Toy Story, thank you very much! However, the Toy Story sticker book only had a few sad, lonely, and unpopular stickers left in it. Where were Emperor Zurg and Baby Head? [No interest in Woody or Buzz Lightyear here. No, we prefer the strange and weird. And, yes, my DH (that's Darling Husband, Jen; not dickhead:)) does blame me.] So I offered The Boy a new Toy Story sticker book if he would do the project with other stickers--Star Wars, animals, anything. I was desperate. Of course he agreed. The Boy is not stupid.

Now it's Sunday night, and the project is nearly complete. I just need to recount the stickers to make sure there are, in fact, 100. Anyone want to help?

Anyway, if you are out and about and see a woman with Buzz Lightyear on her a$$, be sure and say 'Hi!'

{1,2,3,4.....}

Friday Night (de)Lights

Sat, 09 Feb 2008 01:40:59 GMT

*settling in with my wine and dark chocolate*

Well, I have survived another week including the Boy's final dental appointment on Tuesday. Wednesday was all about meetings and somehow I ended up on 3 committees. This year our town needs to bass the regular Board of Education budget (with a 3.99%) increase and also pass a referendum for a brand new shiny middle school. Wednesday's PTA meeting was really a meeting to form a group to handle the campaign to pass both. Anyone with any ideas about how to do this, please let me know. BTW, school funding in this country needs substantial reform. *steps off soapbox*

Thursday was a flurry of activity to prepare for The Girl's Daisy Scout meeting. I baked cookies and made valentines. Now, I'm no Martha Stewart or

rkvincent, but I think I did pretty well. However, an hour before the meeting, The Girl said her tummy hurt and she wanted to rest. Now my mommy radar was pretty sure this was nothing more than a bid for attention. But a little voice inside my head said "what if it's _that_ stomach virus going around?" The voice sounded a lot like jimhines (or at least what I imagine he sounds like). The quickest way to become a Mommy Pariah is to knowingly expose your child's friends/playmates/classmates to _germs_! So I scrounged up a replacement to help run the meeting and sent all the goodies off with her. All of which made for a much more relaxing evening since my mommy radar was right to begin with.  So far, everyone remains healthy. *knocks on wood* I should probably feel guilty....but, I don't.

And I got to talk to my best friend. On the phone, of course, since she's in Michigan. For over an hour. She is the only person I can talk on the phone with for that long. Which should have made my parents happy when we were teenagers, but somehow, calling her was long distance even then. (And this was when long distance was expensive.) I know, crazy! How can 2 people in the same school district (in the same high school) be in separate calling areas? Anyway, we are planning a girl's getaway to celebrate a significant birthday.   All that's required is sun, spa, pool and tropical drinks. We are open to suggestions.

Today I spent some time on arranging for DH's Valentine's day present. I think he'll like it. It may end up being a bit late though. I can't say more in case he's reading this.  But I may post pictures after the fact.

For now all is quiet and peaceful. I am going to try and watch the Lost episode I missed last night. Terry O'Quinn. *Sigh* Hope you all are well.

Hugs!

A little bit of heaven

Sun, 03 Feb 2008 01:02:15 GMT

Earlier stress levels have dropped considerably, largely because of this place:  http://www.theurbanmuse.com/. Yes, Thursday afternoon I spent 90 minutes of pure bliss here. I was massaged, rubbed, and oiled back into a semblance of a sane person. DH if your reading this, I would love a gift certificate from here for Valentine's Day.  And St. Patrick's Day. And April Fools' Day. And Mother's Day. And Flag Day (hey, except for Fathers' Day, June's light on holidays!). Seriously, if your in the area, go check out their jewelry and stay for a massage.  Sadly, you can't shop online.

I'm also still on a quest for the perfect "healthy" cocktail. I call the lastest libation the Cherry Lime Rickey:

Combine in a cocktail shaker:

2 oz. Pom's Pomegranate/Cherry juice
2 oz vodka
1 oz Rose's Lime Juice
Crushed ice

Shake and strain into a martini class. Or since that's pretty strong (hey, it's not me; its based on a classic cosmo recipe), I add the above to about 4 ounces of seltzer. I'm a lightweight and I likes a little fizzle with my schwizzle.

And in other news:

This afternoon The Boy was coloring and offered to "show me how it's done!"

It was a very Happy Groundhogs Day here even though the DH and munchkins weren't able to spot the slippery devil. After the freezing rain yesterday, I'm hoping for Spring in 2 weeks.

Two days into February and no new books. 27 days to go.

And of course, tomorrow is the Superbowl. DH will be here physically but essentially unreachable from about 2 PM on (depending on when the pre-game festivities begin).   We will technically be having a party because there will be cupcakes. One for The Girl and one for The Boy. I couldn't resist. One has blue frosting and the other has pink. It was supposed to be red, I'm sure; but I won't tell The Girl if you don't. No jokes please about the Giants' colors being blue and pink. I don't think DH could take it.

A final note: The gym has called looking for me. Really, they called Friday morning and spoke to DH while I was chauffeuring the munchkins. They were concerned that they hadn't seen me in ~~2 months~~ awhile and want me to come in. Its really kind of touching considering they get paid whether I'm there or not.   Or it would be, if I could get over the guilt of being such a lazy slacker. (Note to self: try really, really hard to go to gym on Monday; your thighs will thank you.)

Currently reading: January 2008 edition of Noctem Aeternus
Up next: I need to start rereading Richelle Mead's Succubus Blues and Succubus on Top for a book club.

FWA

Thu, 31 Jan 2008 15:18:02 GMT

That's Future Writers of America. The Girl firmly maintains that she is going to be a mommy and a life guard when she grows up. (~~Peter Pan~~ The Boy claims he's never going to grow up.) However, there might be one more occupation for my little princess: author/illustrator. Below is a picture of the cover of one of her books. While this is not her first creation, I believe it is the longest (move over Bob the Bunny). Don't worry, I'm only showing the cover; after all, it is still a work in progress.

In case you can't read it, the title is The Bigist Snowman in the Wold. As you can see, it still needs a bit of editing. BTW, that gold circle in the sky is not the sun. No, my girl, she thinks big. That is a ~~Pulitzer Prize~~ Best Illustrator and Author medal.

Her 100 Day Project is complete and submitted, but I am thinking of also doing one with The Boy. (Yes, I have completely lost my mind. Let me know if you find it.) While his class is not actually participating in this momentous event, I think he would enjoy doing one, especially if we used, say, 100 Star Wars stickers. And, by God, I am going to mainstrean this boy whether he (or the school) want to or not! This would of course require a trip to the bookstore which might be difficult for me because of February's goal (no new books for me). But wait! It's still January! ;) Gotta love a good loophole.

I am also going to try measuring The Boy today to see how much he has grown since his last MD appointment. However, he will need to be cooperative and willing; otherwise it's like wrestling with a greased pig.

I'm off to the post office. I really need to mail my father his birthday present. It's a little late or very early depending on your viewpoint. His birthday's in November. Oh, and one last absent minded note. I completely forgot to take the munchkins to gymnastics yesterday. No Mommy or Daugher of the Year award this time.

Total Motivation

Wed, 30 Jan 2008 19:27:57 GMT

Today, I am totally motivated....to do absolutely nothing!

And, as usual, there is much that needs to be done.   I could clean. After all the dust bunnies are breeding like crazy and I'm slowly being surrounded by my children's toys. This is not a good battle tactic since they rarely take prisoners and haven't heard of the Geneva Convention if they do. And my dining room table is covered in buttons because The Girl and I are hard at work on her 100 Days project. {If you don't know what that is, count yourself lucky and move on.}

I did manage to go to the grocery store and buy bread, milk and cheese so neither of the munchkins will starve. I also went house stalking.   That's cruising through the neighborhood you want to live in to see if there are any houses for sale that might not be listed with realtor or through one of the for sale by owner websites. Nada.

Now for other miscellaneous musings....

I've obviously spent too much time downloading new avatars (see above).

I measured The Girl yesterday. 48"! Holy crap; she's 4 feet tall. That's 6 inches in 5 months, and she's only 5 for cris-sake. I checked the CDC's pediatric growth charts. She's off the charts though not by too much. This does explain why most of her pants are too short. The rest seem to be too long and too big around her waist. Poor thing. She's a poster child for builders' bum.

Last night, The Boy and The Girl did a bit of role reversal. Usually The Girl is the one playing teacher and The Boy is the (reluctant) student. (He really doesn't care that Antarctica is a continent not a country.) This time The Boy was teaching The Girl about *monsters.*   Using his Monster book he'd give her two clues and she had to guess what kind of monster he was describing. Much fun was had by all. Then they both tried to convince me they were scared last night at bedtime; but it was clearly a ploy for attention and sleep avoidance. I think I'm the only one who has nightmares in this house. Zombies, vamps and were's, oh my!

The DH and I had a disagreement this morning regarding the boys clothes. I don't understand how a man who has no trouble dressing himself appropriately can have so much difficulty with the munchkins' clothes. The Boy's olive/khaki pants clashed with his hunter green shirt; however, try and convince DH of that. And, if he had his way, The Boy would wear sweats every day. This doesn't bother me; its the fact that his favorite pair of sweats for The Boy have a hole in the butt. I also can't convince him that not every shade of pink will coordinate with another. I have much experience with this because pink is The Girl's favorite color; it's all she would wear for a year. She will now wear other colors, but it's still mostly pink. And don't get me started about turning clothes right-side-out! But I know I shouldn't complain; he does help dress them and help with the laundry. I'm lucky, right? Right?

Also, my anxiety level is high today. No, I have no idea why (other than needing to do housework); but my shoulders are currently pretending to be earrings. Fortunately I have a massage scheduled for tomorrow afternoon.

I have a goal for February. Maybe I'll try and do one every month or maybe not. I guess I'll wait and see how I do with this one. My goal is to not buy any new books in February. OK, any new books for me. I have many, many books in my to-be-read pile so I won't have to go through book-withdrawal or anything. Perhaps this is what's causing my anxiety....

Currently reading: Succubus on Top by Richelle Mead
Just finished: I Am Legend by Richard Matheson
Up next: Patricia Briggs' Mercedes series; reread the first 2, then read the new one just out.

Surviving the Social Faux Pas

Sat, 26 Jan 2008 03:46:37 GMT

I drive my munchkins to and from school. While most of the kids at the school do take the bus, there is a small group of parents like me who also do the "chauffeur" thing. There are two women in this group that look very much alike, so much so that they could easily be sisters. They're both blonde, have similar haircuts and facial features and are close to the same height/build. I don't know either of their names; but I am rather friendly with one of them. Let's call her Lady #1. I haven't actually spoken to the other woman, but I regularly see her at "pick up" and at PTA meetings. Let's call her Lady #2. Lady #1's older son is my daughter's class.  Her younger son gets speech therapy at the school which is another thing we have in common. She also has an older daughter in Girls Scouts, and we often talk about this and that while we wait to pick up the little ones.   I believe Lady # 2 has 2 or 3 girls.

So today I am at Staples getting printer cartridges when I see Lady # 1 shopping there as well. I greet her warmly and chat very briefly and go on my merry way. I should have quit while I was ahead. But, no; we ended up in the check out line together. After the usual, "OMG, this line is so long!" I ask her how the boys are doing. She looks at me oddly. Then I ask, "but you have a girl too right?"    Yes, she says, in the third grade. But now she has begun rummaging through her purse muttering about find her rewards card and giving off a strange vibe. The conversation awkwardly ends.

I continue to stand in line behind her pondering her strange reaction, and then it dawns on me.   Holy &#^%!   Yes, of course you knew from the beginning that it was Lady #2, didn't you? Well, there's no need to be smug, thank you very much.

But.....now what do I do? Do I apologize and admit my mistake? Would that make things even more uncomfortable? Or should I just pretend that nothing has happened? Of course, while I am debating this she finishes checking out and leaves. I am left to worry/wonder about the whole situation, knowing that I will probably see her again in less than 3 hours.

Fortunately, we missed each other at pick up. Do you think it's possible that she'll have forgotten the crazy Staples stalker lady by Monday?

In other news, Tuesday I took The Boy to his "last" dentist appointment to get the last cavity filled. Guess what? One of the other fillings fell out and needs to be replaced. I have obviously picked up some bad karma somewhere.   Even though my previous attempts to get my DH to take him failed, I refuse to give up. Maybe if I start working on him now I can get him to take the next appointment....

We have not one but two birthday parties this weekend. I have already double-checked the dates and times twice. If I mess this up again, I doubt I'll ever hear the end of it. Keep your fingers crossed.

Currently reading: TBD
Just finished: The Vampire of New York by Lee Hunt, Darkling by Yasmine Galenorn, Changeling by Yasmine Galenorn, and Witchling by Yasmine Galenorn. This was my 2nd copy of Darkling; I "misplaced" the first. Of course, that meant a trip to the bookstore. I only meant to get one book and came home with five. Never mind that I have a tower of books waiting to be read. I obviously have a problem and will be joining Bookaholics Anonymous.

Move over Hallmark

Sun, 20 Jan 2008 23:34:26 GMT

Saturday was an emotional roller coaster ride.

The low point: The Boy's tantrum; it was epic. The Girl had drawn a picture specially for me on her new easel, and the Boy decided he wanted it. The Girl kindly offered to draw one just for him. But The Boy would not have it. Screaming, crying, and threats ensued. And that was just me! You should have seen/heard The Boy. It took nearly half an hour, but I did finally get us both calmed down.

The incline: We were finally sitting all snuggy and warm on the couch when I spotted his new Star Wars coloring book. At a playdate earlier this month, I discovered that The Boy would willing "color" (ok, scribble). I'd never been able to get him to color at home. Such a simple thing, but we had been trying to get him to do this for nearly 3 years. So Friday I got him the Star Wars coloring book to encourage his coloring.   His initial reaction was disappointing. He enjoyed looking at the pictures with us, but didn't want to color the pictures. Well, I figured now was as good as time as any to try again. I asked if he wanted to color with me.

The high point: And he said YES! It turns out he's pretty darn good at this coloring thing. One might even say he likes it. Soon The Girl joined us; and then the 2 of them must have spent almost an hour coloring together.   Add in lots of "please" and "thank you."    Move over Grinch; I think my heart grew 4 sizes that day.

They have been coloring together intermittently all weekend.  {happy sigh}   Ah, the power of crayons....or another Crayola moment ;)!

Excuse me, I'd like to get off the ride now, please.

Currently reading: Changeling by Yasmine Galenorn
Just finished: Witchling by Yasmine Galenorn
Up next: Darkling by Yasmine Galenorn (Assuming I can find it. I know I bought it, but it seems to have disappeared. I'll have to check The Boy's room; he's been known to make off with my books.)

Free to good home...

Mon, 14 Jan 2008 18:31:24 GMT

One uterus. Free to good home. Older model, but only used once. Highly efficient with expanded capacity. Original residents were very happy but forced out.

Now where's the $*&% Midol!?

The Week in Review (3rd attempt)

Mon, 14 Jan 2008 15:39:18 GMT

OK, let's try this again.

Monday: "Krystn Goes to the DMV:" Somehow I managed to lose my drivers license. It was last seen in December, but I didn't know it was missing until last week. I've been driving around for a month without it. Of course that means I've been paranoid that'll I be pulled over. I already used up my "get out of jail" free card for driving without a license last year. Our police are pretty lenient with locals, and I was "only" pulled over for a (barely) expired inspection sticker. Of course, it helped that I had The Boy in the car, who was cute and excited to see the police officer. Who can resist The Boy?

Now this is going to shock you, but I was frustrated/disappointed with my experience at the DMV office. Did I have to wait in line for ever? No. Only 3 people were ahead of me. Did I have all the appropriate documentation for a replacement license? Yes, my passport, SS card, back statement, credit card statement, ATM card, and a partridge in a pear tree. The 6 Point ID system is fun! Were the staff rude or inefficient? No, they were polite, friendly and one even cracked a joke. Yes, I said I was at the DMV. Now I am ready for the final stage of the process: picture taking and payment. Now the only bright side to the situation was that I was going to get a new DL picture. The one I had wasn't the worst picture I'd ever taken (see my passport for that), but it was bad enough. I pay my $11 dollars and the lady waiting on me tells me to take a seat. I look in confusion at the camera system next to here. Hmmmm. Maybe she takes the picture after payment, maybe it needs batteries. Who knows? So I return to my seat for about 3 minutes. See very efficient. The nice lady calls me back to her window and hands my my new license complete with the OLD picture. Damn this digital photography!

Tuesday: "The Boy Goes to the Dentist (#4):" You could probably write this one for me by now. Long drive to dentist; this time with bonus traffic. Crying and screaming while in the chair. Long drive back to school. But this time the school didn't get my message about that The Boy would be late due to this appointment. That meant I had to field a call from the ~~truant police~~ school nurse ~~hounding~~ asking me where he was. Apparently there is truancy problem among Kindergartners at his school. I guess they are ditching school and doing to the mall instead.

Wednesday: "Meetings, Meetings, Meetings" I don't really mind meetings if they are well run and not filled with hostility. Fortunately that night's PTA meeting was both those things and short to boot. But, these meetings are always at night (understandably) which is tiring for an "old lady" like me. Plus, I had to make an emergency run to the grocery store after the meeting.

Thursday: "Meetings, Meetings, Meetings (contd)" The meeting on Thursday night was my daughters Daisy Girl Scout meeting. I spent much of the day prepping for this. I'm beginning to think I make these meetings more complicated than they need to be. Do Kindergartners really need the petals for their craft/projected laminated? One of these days I'm going to figure out that these are little kids and not the doctors and business people I used to work with.

Friday: "Assembly Required:" I am an Assembly Goddess. I am! I put together a train table and an easel. I am proud to announce that I did not get halfway through, need to disassemble anything, and then start over. That may have happened before. And, drum roll please, there were no mysterious parts left over. The best part of all of this is that my daughters dollhouse is now off the living room floor and out of the main traffic pattern. I haven't tripped over her dog house in 3 days! Woot!

Saturday/Sunday: Although not exactly restful, it was pretty productive. I even managed to have lunch with some friends. It's a good reality check. My life is not the only one that gets wild and crazy. I did have another meeting on Saturday which I'll just call "interesting."

Currently reading: The House at Riverton by Kate Morton. Yes, still! I know, I know. What't taking so long? Did you read the above? Plus I am reading this for an online book club that is huge. By the time I started reading/replying to posts there were over 800. During the week I got that number down to the mid 100's and am midway through the book. But as of last night there are over 400 posts again! Whew. This is turning into work.

Up next: Darkling by Yasmine Galenorn. Tez, I promise I'll get to it as soon as I can.

Happy Monday!

Enough already!

Mon, 14 Jan 2008 03:26:42 GMT

OK!~ I've lost this post twice. The computer and I need a break. I'll try again tomorrow. Maybe.

2008: The Year of the House

Fri, 04 Jan 2008 02:48:51 GMT

Alright, 2008 is really the year of the Rat. Fortunately, the Chinese New Year is not until 2/7/08 so I'm not really behind on my resolutions. OK, so I'm not Chinese, but give a girl a break. I could use one.

And 2008 will be the year of The House. It has to be.

Say it with me, "We will find our (dream?) house this year." Repeat ad nauseum.

Requirements:

3+ bedrooms
2.5 baths. Yes I need that half bath. And if you are planning to visit, you want it too. Otherwise, you may trip and hurt yourself on a bath toy. Kissing of boo boo's and Princess band aids will follow. See, you agree with me now, don't you?
In the town we currently live in.
Colonial, contemporary, split-level or ranch in that order of preference
Updated kitchens and baths (or priced so we can afford to update)
Level back yard
Close to our current school
2-car garage
Not in a flood zone

DH Requirements:

All of the above plus-

1.   Public water
2.   Public sewer
3.   Neighborhood with sidewalks
4.   Built later than 1970
5.   Extremely flat back yard (think pancake)
6.   No powerlines in the area; high tension or low tension, it doesn't matter
7.   No cell phone towers in the area
8.   Quiet street
9.   Completely dry basement without use of a sump pump
10. No ranch houses
11. No easements of any kind
12. Preferably no deer, bear, or coyote in the neighborhood; but that could conflict with my number 1
13. Mystery requirement. I don't know what this is, but God, I hope he finds it this year.

Now, let's all engage in some positive visualization.

Thank you.

Currently reading: Kate Morton's The House at Riverton
Just finished: Jeanne Stein's Anna Strong series
Next up: Darkling or Elijah
Net g/l: +.5

Raspberries!

Sat, 29 Dec 2007 04:57:26 GMT

Woooohoooo! The Boy tried raspberries. The Boy loves raspberries. We're doing the happy dance all over the place! Off to celebrate.

Just finished: My Big Fat Supernatural Honeymoon
Up next: Jeanne Stein's Becoming AND Kate Morton's The House at Riverton (also know as dueling book clubs)
Quote of the Day: "I love raspberries!" from The Boy

OMG...I'm a Grown-Up!

Fri, 28 Dec 2007 03:47:06 GMT

Well, I finally feel like an adult.   Did I feel "grown up" when I graduated from high school or college? When I got my first real job? When I turned 30? When I got married? When I had kids? Nope. I still kept waiting for "that" feeling; you know the one, that I knew what I was doing, that I was an adult. Well, it finally happened, and what did it take? I hosted a "holiday" at my house. Forty years old, married for 8, and I'd never done that. Christmas day my in-laws came here. I even managed to feed them; and according to the latest reports, they are all still alive. Although, I do think we made a little too much food. We are still eating left-overs, and I don't think I'll have to cook again until New Years. Which is good if you don't mind living on "appetizers."

The Munchkins had a wonderful Christmas.  I did fewer Christmas-y things this year this year. The tree went up late. We only managed to bake one batch of cookies. We didn't go to the twins club Christmas party and get our picture taken with Santa. Proof once again that less is more.  We also spent Christmas eve at home for the first time. I knew that would make things less stressful, but, WOW, did I underestimate how much. DH is off work the the rest of the week; and we are enjoying being able to spend time together (or I am at least...;)).

We went to the bookstore for the 2nd day in a row at the request of The Boy. He seems to have inherited my love of books (as long as they are about Star Wars, Bionicles or Transformers). The Girl also loves books, reading, writing, and illustrating them. Oh how I would love to have an author for a daughter! But as long as she's happy, I really don't care what she does. Her current aspiration is to be a mom and a lifeguard. She wants a boy and a girl. She says she'll name the girl after me (but with a normal spelling) and the boy after her brother. She is too damn cute!

Off to bed now. As cute as they are, they still are morning people like their daddy.

Happy New Year! Wishing you all health, peace and happiness.

Currently reading: My Big Fat Supernatural Honeymoon
Next up: The Becoming by Jeanne Stein
Quotes of the day: "This is the best Christmas, ever!"  and "HUG!" both from The Girl

Oh, Christmas tree. Oh, Christmas tree!

Sat, 22 Dec 2007 22:18:21 GMT

From Friday:

Today we finally decorated the Christmas after 2 days of struggling with the lights. We are definitely buying a pre-lit tree after Christmas. I redid the lights for the 3^rd time this AM, all the time muttering that this was not what Christmas was about. I knew they did not have to be perfect, but could not sync my emotional and intellectual sides. I hate that, hate knowing that I am being ridiculous but not being able to stop. But I had to finish them before the munchkins got home from school. I had promised The Girl that we could put the ornaments on the tree this afternoon. She has been so very patient waiting for the tree this year. Note to self: never again have house painted in December.

Then I read Yasemine’s http://yasminegalenorn.livejournal.com/ post, which made me cry. I always seem to get overly emotional around the holidays. My poor family; I don’t know how they put up with me. I finally started to feel a little better after reading Lilith’s blog http://www.lilithsaintcrow.com/journal/. I finally started to feel normal when The Girl & I decorated the tree. The Boy only wanted to play with the ornaments. But they both had fun. I let The Girl put on most of ornaments, so, of course, most of them are at her eye level. And you know what? It looks perfect! Maybe next year she’ll let me play Christmas music while we decorate. She will let me sing Christmas carols with her this year! Yeeehaaa! Usually both munchkins tell me to stop whenever I try to sing.

This week is finally over. It has been exhausting. Mentor training on Monday. Mentor training follow up and paperwork on Tuesday. Dentist with The Boy on Wednesday (another 3 cavities filled, 2 more to go). Thursday I had the Daisy troop’s holiday party. The Boy was up four times in the night last night, so I am really tuckered out. Hopefully I’ll sleep well tonight; off to bed now. G’night.

Reading: Another One Bites the Dust by Jennifer Rardin

Up next: The Becoming by Jeanne Stein

Quote of the day: “Isn’t the tree beautiful, Mommy?”

Net g/l: (1)

Lost: one act

Tue, 18 Dec 2007 04:53:26 GMT

I used to have my act together, but now I've managed to lose it. I used to be organized. Really! I think I was even voted "most organized" in my senior year of high school. But we all know how accurate those things are. Someday, I'll tell you about the girl voted "most honest."

Anyway, this afternoon we had mentor training at my kids elementary school. My job should have been fairly simple. Round up the kids and distribute them to their parents after the program. I had requested help from others in the organization, but I don't think I was assertive enough in my request. There were 31 4th and 5th graders. And me. Way more than had RSVP'd. Six more than the group doing the training was prepared for. Including an entire girl scout troop. This kind of interest is fantastic, and all would have been fine. Except that I forgot to get a sitter for the munchkins. FORGOT! Try keeping two 5-year olds entertained and quiet for 2.5 hours, especially if one of them has ASD. Then I realized that the program I thought was 1.5 hours was actually 2 hours. That meant trying to sign out 31 kids to aggravated parents while The Boy was in full meltdown mode. He wanted to go home and everyone in a five mile radius knew it. AAAAAARRRRRGGGGGHHHHH!

As they say, some days it's not worth chewing through the restraints.

Well, back to my wine and book....it may take awhile to destress.

Currently reading: Once Bitten, Twice Shy by Jennifer Rardin (she ROCKS!)
Up next: Another One Bites the Dust by....Jennifer Rardin (btw, she rocks!)
Net g/l: (???)

And....they're outta here!!!

Sun, 16 Dec 2007 02:02:07 GMT

We'll the painters are gone. Both bathrooms are finally the right color....it's too long and painful a story to tell here. But now I am sitting back and lovin' my pale almond walls. Of course, now we have to put the house back together, and DH is asking about when will we put up the Christmas tree. Yikes! Well, me and Scarlett, we'll worry about that tomorrow. Fortunately, most of the holiday shopping is done.

So, I should be happy as a clam. But I'm not; and I even got a decent night's rest last night. Just one of those sad days with no real reason, I guess.

Tomorrow will be a big baking day. The munchkins want gingerbread cookies. And what the munchkins want, the munchkins get. At least if we want peace in the Denville for the holidays.

Hugs!

Currently reading: nada (maybe that's the problem)
Up next: Once Bitten Twice Shy by Jennifer Rardin